Adolescent Psychologist, Wollongong

Whilst some level of moodiness is expected as teenagers grow, when it becomes persistent (so not just in relation to this week’s crisis) it’s usually an indicator that something is not quite right. In this age group mood and anxiety problems often look like extreme stress, teariness, irritability, anger, explosiveness or dramatic and/or exaggerated responses to issues. Kinda like what you would expect to see in an adult…only not quite as well articulated. 

Parents often describe themselves as “walking on eggshells.” Sometimes (but not always) this can be accompanied by behavioural markers like self harm, suicidality, restrictive eating, school refusal, drug use, or repeat peer conflict. This area covers labels such as emotion dysregulation, depression and anxiety.

During our early teenage years, our social brain starts to understand and evaluate ourselves in comparison to the rest of the pack. We’re highly focused on what others think and often physical appearance is the easiest place to start drawing comparisons. Whilst some teens can navigate through this time unscathed, for others, this doesn’t always go well, turning into nasty thoughts about our own body and our self worth. 

Some warning signs for struggles in this area include negative self talk, sudden changes in diet or exercise, fixation on weight/shape, or changes in food behaviours (wanting to cook their own dinners, read food labels, or participate in the grocery shopping). This area covers a huge range of presentations including low self esteem, through to formal diagnosis such as Anorexia Nervosa, Bulimia, or ARFID.

Any high school teacher will tell you that managing year nine is often the hardest. This is because between ages fifteen and seventeen, there is rapid brain and body development BUT emotional and social skills lag behind. Hence, the drama.

Whilst some young people can coast through, others can get caught in the middle, struggling to manage conflict, communicate effectively and maintain consistent friendships. This can be a tricky place for a parent to navigate because… well… not many teenagers want advice from their parents around friends. But luckily, we’re different and we can help out.

“Acting out” in this age often looks like testing the limits and risk taking. Some of this is normal teenage development, but persistent defiance/disregard for authority or dangerous behaviours are a different issue. 

This area covers things like repeated suspensions, school refusal, fights, lying, drug misuse or not following household rules. These behaviours can be an indicator of underlying issues like ADHD, learning problems, low social skills, or mood issues.

In our middle teenage years we start to understand big concepts - like intent, consequence and choice. This means that during this age, processing hard things like abuse, loss, grief and trauma can be very difficult. It’s normally our first experience of the world as unjust or unfair and it can be difficult to understand. And hey, even as adults we can’t always explain it right?

This area covers things like coping with divorce, family conflict, loss of loved ones, chronic illness, or abuse and assault